Goddess Mephistaherodyphia - A Correction

The Book of Bartholomew, in the story The Consuming Fires of Gerald, mentions erroneously that Mephistaherodyphia is the goddess of beauty.  This is a partially incorrect statement. Beauty is just one of the qualities embodied by the great goddess Mephistaherodyphia.  Well, not beauty exactly.  Beauty is a rough translation from the original Greek: λαμπρός .  Upon translating many Greek manuscripts on the subject of the goddess, the German historian Albert Grothe once wrote in 1765, “Many quixotic attributes have been used to reveal Mephistaherodyphia, not withstanding: magnificent, refulgent, radiant, an overwhelming presence, feral, wild, emasculating.  There, one senses in the beauty and presence of Mephistaherodyphia, she is ascendent while the mortal is descendent.  One remains not in a locus ere the presence of Mephistaherodyphia, one moves lower, while she rises to a position of power and radiance.”

Of course, this statement was translated from old German into old English which was then updated to wording that can be understood by the contemporary reader. The German word used by Grothe for “refulgent” is “ungezahmt.”  He also used “entmannt” for emasculating, which is a little harsher than the Greek word.  But Grothe was a strict man, not one for partying or jokes.  His cousin, Ozoman, once said that Albert was like “ein Pflaume in einem Topf pissen.“  One would then have to take into account that Grothe's translations might be a bit, as the Italians say, 'aspro.'  The great Japanese  historian, Jacob Stankowitz, also once alluded to Grothe's translations as being 臭いおならのような.  There cannot be much argument when someone of Stankowitz' stature speaks so openly about another's ability. 

Mephistaherodyphia appears in many cultures throughout history.  In the third symphony written by Sibelius, the great Finnish composer, Mephistaherodyphia appears in the third movement, when the leader of the Finnish Socialists proclaims: „repiä sydämeni minun ammottava rinta, oh Mephistaherodyphia. Minä en ole kelvollinen istua teidän ulosteet saastuneella paska potin.”  Of course, in the contemporary art scene, her grace and beauty has adorned many cd covers and she is one of the few gods who has been able to crossover to the hip-hop audience.  Dr. Djwuan has based a trio of popular works around the phrase ”Mephistaherodyphia, I've found you got so much life in ya, bust it up, bust it up.”

Mephistaherodyphia's actions in The Book of Bartholomew, not allowing someone to be born for an entire year, is consistent with her character.  She was one of the jealous gods.  In fact, due to the great work of Lithuanian historian Angus Tarshanty and his research into gods and their sport, it was discovered that when playing team games, the gods often divided themselves into ”jealous” vs  ”genial.”  Finally, due to some questionable research techniques employed by the infamous Scottish archeologist Shikrat Mokatoglu, it was determined that the day Gerald was momentarily free to graze upon the women of the world, Team Jealous won the game of kickball 1,567 to 1,498.