“Thanks for biking with me to this Earth
Day thing,” Claire said to Ned.
“Yeah, well…this is going to be
fun,” said Ned as he shivered in the cold wind.
“You really don’t have to, you
know,” said Claire as she downshifted so Ned could keep up.
“No, I think (puff)…Earth Day (gasp)…is
great,” said Ned. “Tell me again…why are
we celebrating…Earth Day in March?”
“Because Mayor Dick is a total
idiot. He didn’t realize Earth Day is in
April and by the time he figured it out he was already booked for that
day. So he declared Earth Day in our
city to be on March 22nd because it fit his schedule.”
They pedaled along to the sounds of
Ned huffing and puffing. As City Hall
appeared, booths and food vendors filled the streets and the great lawn in
front was almost empty. On a stage was a
band playing some country rock song about how incompetent the government is.
“Let’s head over that way,” said
Claire as she nodded toward some booths.
“I want to see if Charlotte is volunteering.”
Claire and Ned locked their bikes to a rack and headed over to find
Charlotte. They passed the Trees of Hope and Food Fit booths. Claire was looking ahead for the next booth when
Ned noticed the attractive women at the Food
Fit booth. He took a leaflet they
were handing out about healthy food, along with recipes. Ned thanked them and said he may come back
later because he liked healthy food.
“Awesome!” the young women replied.
They passed the Robo-Green Revolution, Not In My Back 40, Garden Yourself, and the Solar Collector Collection booths before
Claire finally saw Charlotte. She was
working at the local progressive AM radio station booth, WGRN.
“Hey,
Charlotte!” said Claire.
“Hi
Claire. Hi Ned,” said Charlotte.
“How's it
going?” asked Claire while Ned just stared at Charlotte with a silly grin on
his face.
“It's been
slow – no crowd at all. It's not surprising since the whole event was moved up
a month. It's freezing out here!” she
said as she blew into her hands and rubbed them together.
Upon
hearing Charlotte's words, Claire's eyes widened with anger and she began a
diatribe. “Can you believe that? Mayor Dick is such a...such an...idiot. Forgetting Earth Day is in April and moving
the city's celebration to March. Oh, it
steams me! I just can't imagine what
would possess him to be so arrogant – so
backward about these things.”
“I think he
didn't want people to show up for the real Earth Day, so he moved it.” said
Charlotte. “His record on the
environment has been pretty bad. This is
worse than not acknowledging Earth Day at all.
Look, there's hardly anybody here.”
Wanting to
impress Charlotte, Ned said, “Yeah, maybe he really didn't want them to show
up. And...and...” He was looking for something to say that
would sound intelligent. “Maybe he
wanted to toot his horn about his new small business initiative that is
supposed to help reduce carbon emissions.”
“That
initiative doesn't do anything to reduce emissions,” said Claire. “He just says it does. It will actually increase emissions because
it allows larger businesses to create more under a cap and trade agreement.”
“Yeah, and
he could toot his horn next month if he wanted anyway,” added Charlotte. “When its warm out.”
Ned
shrugged his shoulders and changed the topic, “Are you and Topping going to
garden with Bartholomew?”
“Yeah, I'm
so excited. This is going to be
fun. I've never gardened before, have
you?”
“No, not
really,” said Ned. “My parents had a small garden but I never helped them with
it.” Neither of them asked Claire that
question, because they knew her parents really liked gardening-- and they even raised
chickens. As Ned began to wonder why it
was that he never helped his parents garden, he noticed several crows flying
toward a tree behind the stage. Then he
noticed that the tree, which looked like it had leaves, was actually full of
birds.
The band
stopped playing and a woman's voice rang out, “Ladies and gentleman,
welcome! Welcome all of you to the Great
Earth Day Celebration!” A few cheers rose
from the pitifully small crowd as people turned to face the Deputy Mayor.
“It is a
great honor to have you all here. It's a
little chilly, but seeing all of you warms my heart,” said the woman. Applause rose from the crowd, mostly to keep
their hands warm; a couple people whistled.
“Let me delay no longer. I have
the great honor of introducing to you the person most responsible for this
Earth Day celebration. A person without whose
leadership and guidance this city wouldn't be the spectacular place it is. Ladies and gentlemen, your mayor and your
friend, Mayor Dick!”
There was
no applause or cheers from the smattering of cold people standing around. The word “moron” was heard inside some
muffles coming from somewhere back by the display booths.
“Thank you,
thank you,” boomed the voice of Mayor Dick. The mic was too loud. “What a great honor to be with you all here on
this beautiful day – Earth Day.”
“But it’s
not Earth Day!” yelled a young woman's voice.
Mayor Dick
didn't notice the comment or the few robins and mourning doves that began to
circle overhead. He continued, “I am as
proud as anyone of the great strides our fair city has made under my mayorship
toward a greener and more vibrant city.
I, and the city council and city staff...” a “boo” was heard from the
crowd... “have worked tirelessly to bring this city into the greening of the 21st
Century. It is with great pleasure that
I read the following list of our accomplishments. First, an additional four acres of green
space in our residential neighborhoods...”
“Due to
foreclosures,” the young woman's voice interrupted.
Ignoring
the heckle, Mayor Dick continued, “...for our children to play in. A new local food vendor for our public
schools...”
“Donkey
Burgers are going to make them all fat!”
“...that
will provide healthy, nutritious food for our children.”
“Donkey
Burgers cause heart disease!” said Claire as she moved toward the podium. The sun now dimmed as numerous birds flew
overhead. Robins, mourning doves, crows,
chickadees, warblers, cardinals and even a few chickens created a massive dark
cloud that became noisier with each proclamation by Mayor Dick.
“The city
fleet has reduced its gas consumption by fifteen percent.”
“Due to job
loss!”
Mayor Dick
refused to acknowledge Claire, but directed his comments to other people in the
crowd. “We have created a small business
plan that will reduce small business carbon emissions by thirty percent.”
“But it
will allow large businesses to increase their carbon emissions by forty
percent,” said Claire as she stepped up next to the stage.
Mayor Dick scowled
her way and continued with agitation in his voice, “Citizens of this fair
metropolis, fear not of the future, for I and the council will continue always
to protect our land, water and air while also protecting our high-quality way
of life.” He paused for a moment as he
witnessed a single white dove feather fall down from the sky and land on
Claire's dark green beret. The sound of
chirps and calls grew louder
“You're a
liar!” yelled Claire only a few feet from Mayor Dick.
“Now that
is not fair!” yelled an offended Mayor Dick directly at Claire. “nothing I have
said is a lie.” A cacophony of squawks,
chirps, calls, crowings and gobblings almost drowned out the interchange
between Claire and Mayor Dick.
“Well, it
hasn't been the truth either,” Claire yelled back.
“You, my dear,
are the liar here. And I will not let
you deceive the fine people of this city with your misguided understanding of
what is important and what I have accomplished.
It is I who has been elected to be the protector of this fair city from
the misinformation and cynical enviro-propoganda you are espousing,” replied Mayor
Dick.
Claire did
not give quarter. “Donkey Burger is not
going to provide healthy and nutritional meals to our schools. The only reason
they make burgers out of donkey meat is because donkey meat isn't considered a
food item by the FDA. They do it so they
don't have to follow regulations – so they can cut corners and MAKE MORE
MONEY!”
“I will not
stand here and listen to you slander my good friend Gerald. He has run his Donkey Burger business above
board and with great success for many years.”
With this, the birds descended-- as a single organism-- to within five
feet of Mayor Dick's head. Hundreds of
birds were flying en masse in figure eights and diving to and fro just above
his head, but still he paid no attention.
He only could see Claire, her red face and angry eyes.
“Gerald?
Gerald? Above board? Do you have any
idea what he buys his daughter for Christmas presents?” said Claire in disgust.
“Whatever
he buys her has nothing to do with what kind of man Gerald is. “You obviously are not here because you care
about Earth Day...or the earth. Someone
please remove this girl from these festivities,” said Mayor Dick as he signaled
to a security guard.
With that, Claire
ran, and the birds flew off to distant rooftops, trees and places unseen. Claire wanted to blend in with the crowd and
disappear too, but there was no crowd.
She headed toward the booth where Charlotte and Ned were standing.
“Help, they’re
coming to remove me!” said Claire.
“Quick, you
can hide under here,” said Charlotte.
“If they
want us to leave, why don't we just leave?” asked Ned.
Claire's
voice came from under the table inside the WGRN booth, “Ned, go get our bikes
and then we can get away. Bring mine
here. I need to hide!”
Ned's face
folded up in a look of “Do I have to?” But
he turned and went to fetch Claire's bike.
He was back in a few minutes.
“Ned. Put it by the back of the booth,” said
Claire's voice. Ned did as he was
told. “I'll meet you back at Madeline
Park by the water fountain. Then let's
go get some lunch.” Claire shot out from
under the table, got on her bike and was gone.
As she saw
Claire disappear over a hill in the distance, Charlotte said, “That
Claire. She is amazing how she isn't
afraid to stand up to them. She is so
inspiring.”
Ned wasn't
feeling inspired. He thought about going
back to the Food Fit booth and talking to the attractive women. But he wasn't feeling right about that. He thought about talking with Charlotte a while
and getting to know her better. But he wasn't
feeling like doing that today either. He mounted his bike and slowly pedaled
away from the Earth Day celebration. Ned
suddenly realized what he was feeling – he was feeling alone.
__________________________________________________________________
Written by Mark Granlund
Illustrations by Matt Wells
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